Fame! I'm gonna watch it forever.

Being of the generation I am of, I have seen the Alan Parker movie Fame many times, watched the TV series as it originally aired (yes, all seasons), and saw the new feature film on opening day. The original movie is the best, hands down, but for me the TV show that ran all through the eighties has the most sentimental value. So when I was at the library a couple of weeks ago and saw that they had the complete first season on DVD, I grabbed it! I've been watching it and let me tell you. Like most TV shows from my childhood and adolescence, the memory of watching it doesn't quiiiiite match up with what I see when re-watching it.

For one, okay, the TV Coco can't sing. I mean it's not like listening to American Idol auditions or anything, and I like her acting, but she is no Irene Cara when it comes to the pipes. Also, TV Doris looks about nine years past high school, but maybe she's there so that TV Bruno (who is also Original Bruno) doesn't look old all by himself. But, it's all about Original/TV Leroy aka Gene Anthony Ray (may he rest in peace), always my favorite. And Debbie Allen is still fabulous, both dancing and acting. Child, you do not want Ms. Grant mad at you! Some of the musical numbers aren't half bad, like when the kids put on Othello despite the teacher strike, and even Danny dances.

All things considered, it's still awesome. Watching it again reminds me what I loved about it: The school and the sets and the clothes the students wear all look really real. They always seemed to me like normal kids (other than the fact that they were so old) in a grubby school like mine, hanging in the band room like I did, surrounded by water-stained soundproofing tiles, and of course wearing leg warmers. I loved Leroy and his relationships with Ms. Grant and Sherwood. I loved the music, even when it was bad, because I loved the idea of performing, and busting out into song at any moment to express the angst of growing up. In fact, in junior high I was known to jump up on the cafeteria table and start belting "Hard Knock Life" from Annie. That may be a post for another day.

I have tried to get into Glee. I have. But I'll take Fame any day of the week. I now have all the seasons in my Netflix queue, and can't wait for Janet Jackson and Nia Peeples to make their appearances in later seasons.

Jammin' in the lunch room!

The DJ in Me

True story . . . in college I was a radio DJ. And I took gigs on the side spinning records (yes, those were the days of RECORDS) in very dirty, very rough clubs downtown. I loved it. My play list THEN would likely include . . . The Ramones, Lou Reed, Peter Gabriel, and some unheard of acts like EBN OZN. As well as the Smiths . . . the Clash. Oh, those were the DAYS.

So flash foward to three Christmases ago. Significant Other purchases me the (at the time) Rolls Royce of iPods--video, 160 GB of storage. I looked at said gift and did not speak the thought I had aloud. "What the HECK am I going to do with this thing?"

You see, I had an extensive CD collection. Do you mean to tell me I had to download ALL that music onto some little portable device? The idea was madness. Until . . . I started.

I now have the equivalent of enough music on my iPod to survive a nculear fallout without having to repeat songs. When my iPod is not up-to-date, I feel panic.

Sunday night, I did a major update. I erased all my old playlists and created new ones. I bought music (the Across the Universe Jim Sturgess Beatle remakes; songs from GLEE; old Rolling Stones plus a Fatboy Slim remix). I channeled my inner DJ.

What's on my iPod? Oh, all the names I listed from when I was a DJ. But lots and LOTS of new names: Ray LeMontagne, Jeff Buckley, Fatboy Slim, Modest Mouse, Bell 1X, Glenn Hansard, Kings of Leon . . .

So . . . anyone else channel their inner DJ? And what's on your iPod right this SECOND? Hit shuffle and tell me.

All right . . . shuffle . . . .

SHIP OF FOOLS by World Party!

My Favorite Websites

This week the topic at TFC is blogs and websites. There are more blogs that I check out from time to time than I can count, but I don't dare try to make a list of those I like best, because no sooner would I press Publish Post than I'd see someone post a blog link on Twitter and then I'd think, "D'oh! How could I have forgotten X? I hope X doesn't see this post and then get hurt/annoyed at not being included!" Of course I could always edit the post, adding another link, but that would just start a chain of such editing/linking and I do have a few other things to do today - "General Hospital" is on in less than four hours!!! - so...

I'm just going to link my three favorite websites for writers and readers, two of which are forums, one of which is a weekly reader devoted to the love of books. These are the places that, in addition to checking in at Twitter and Facebook, are absolute musts for me.

Backspace is a discussion forum for writers at all stages of their careers, from those still trying to figure out what to write to NYT bestselling authors. With 1192 current members - and counting! - it's the best place I know for those dreaming of getting published to learn every aspect of the craft of writing and the business of publishing and for published authors to network and get support from others. I wish BKSP had been in existence when I first started out and am very glad to have it as part of my life now.

BookBalloon is my favorite forum for book lovers to discuss every sort of book imaginable. There are some threads for writers, but this is really a reader-centric site where in addition to talk about books and publishing news, there are monthly book discussions focusing on individual titles.

BiblioBuffet, subtitled "Writing Worth Reading, Reading Worth Writing About," posts several new literary-related essays every Sunday night. I have an every-other-week column there called "Writer-in-Residence," in which I write essays and reviews. I also recently launched a new semi-regularly feature there that I'm insanely happy about called "The Disrespectful Interviewer," in which I ask incredibly rude questions of prominent authors. The first one ran a week ago Sunday, Dissing Jon Clinch. I hope people will give it a look.

So how about you? What are your favorite websites? Or, if you're braver than I am, what are your favorite blogs?

Be well. Don't forget to write.

My favorite foodie website

Since we are talking about websites and blogs this week on TFC, I thought I'd share my favorite recipe website. It's that time of year where people are doing a lot of cooking and baking after all. So my go-to site when I'm looking for something fun to make is Vegweb.com. As the name suggests, it is a vegan website and I'm sure not all of you are vegan, but don't let that scare you. Instead, I dare you to use it to try something new! Vegan food is very delicious and often very healthy. You'll probably find a lot of twists on old favorites.

I went vegetarian when I was 13 years old and vegan when I was 17 (though I did have a lapse in my early 20s where I started eating dairy again, but it really upsets my stomach so I went back). I was not a cook by any means when I started. The reason I didn't go vegan until 17 is because I was moving in with a vegan friend who knew how to cook, so she could teach me. My mom was kinda at a loss about vegan cooking. Pretty much pasta and salad was all she could figure out to make for me.

So I started cooking when I moved in with my friend Tai and I bought a couple vegan cookbooks over the years. But while I was in college, I really fell into the stirfry tofu with some vegetable and rice or eat a vegan frozen meal trap. I was busy and I was living with a guy who didn't cook with much flair or flavor (everything was too spicy for him). But after I kicked him out, Tai moved back in and I was inspired to have my old cooking buddy back. I've been a serious cook for about four years now. My prize wedding gifts were new cookware. No joke, I'm a total vegan cooking nerd!

I discovered Vegweb.com when I was doing revisions on my first book I WANNA BE YOUR JOEY RAMONE. I was working a 9 to 5 job and had to come home and get write to work on revisions, but I didn't want to sacrifice and go back to frozen meals. Conveniently Vegweb has a "Quick & Easy" category, so I printed out a ton of recipes from there. And then I was hooked. I have a writer's group that I cook for every other week so when I get bored with my cookbooks, I find a recipe on there and it has yet to fail me. The other girl who hosts our group consults Vegweb regularly too. Last week, it was her birthday and I decided I wanted to bake something for her. While I am a cook, I am not much of a baker, but it's something new I want to get into more. I decided I wanted to find some sort of red velvet cake recipe to try. Lo & behold, here is one on Vegweb! It was totally delicious, though I followed the frosting recipe from the person who included their frosting recipe in the comments instead because it looked better to me (and it was amazing!). That is what is super cool about Vegweb is that usually people leave comments about modifications they make to recipes and it helps you play around to get the perfect dish.

So yeah, check it out and let me know what you think. Are you much of a cook? Do you have any favorite foodie websites (of course I'm extra excited about vegetarian ones, but whatever floats your boat)?

My deep dark fashion secret

In the spirit of full disclosure, I am going to reveal my deepest, darkest secret where fashion is concerned.

I loathe clothes shopping.

There, I said it. I know many women and girls love shopping for clothes. They love trying on a billion things and scouting for bargains. They love the rush of a great sale when the blouse they've been eyeing is suddenly half off. And I used to be one of them. Really, I did.

I'm not sure when this change happened. But now, I buy nearly all of my clothes online. I only shop in stores if I absolutely have to. Part of it, I think, is that I have a very unusually shaped figure. Nothing that's currently in style looks good on me, and I'm that weird not-quite-petite-not-quite-average height so nearly everything is either too short or needs to be hemmed. If I'm going to tack on $10-20 for each piece of clothing to be hemmed so I don't look like I'm wearing my husband's castoffs, I'd better like it. Which, sadly, is a rare occurrence.

There are pros and cons to ordering online. The pros are, most obviously, convenience. And with so many online retailers offering free shipping this fall, it's a no-brainer. Especially if you can return it to a local store's catalog dept instead of paying for return shipping.

The cons are many, however. Colors often don't look the same on screen/in catalog as they do in real life, sizes can vary widely, and sometimes things are tucked or twisted on the models so they don't actually look the way they do in real life.

Sometimes it's worth it, and sometimes it's not. I placed one order this year for tall boots, skirts and sweaters for book signings. Since most of my wardrobe consists of yoga pants and polar fleece, upgrading my wardrobe is a priority. This particular order was probably a dozen items, of which I hoped I might get lucky and find three that worked. Imagine my surprise when I kept every single one! It was like winning the shopping lottery, I tell you. I even did a little dance, I was so giddy.

And then there was another order I placed. I ordered the same pants in the same size in two colors. One fit perfectly around the waist but was an inch too long and the other gaped around the waist but was the perfect length. If I could've combined the best features of these supposedly identical pants, they would've been perfect. And they were almost 40% off! So... I ended up deciding to order those pants again, but order a couple of each figuring that surely I would find a keeper in each color that way. I also ordered them in a third color because they're perfect wardrobe builder trousers (and I often order basics that fit me in several colors because it's so hard to find good basics that work on me).

Anywho... 7 pairs later, I managed to find two pairs that were mildly close to fitting properly. Not even a great fit, just an okay fit. The other five varied in length and waist size regardless that they were the exact same pant, exact same size, just in different colors. Crazy.

So that's my deep dark fashion secret. Even though fashion plays a role in my books, I secretly detest having to do the shopping thing in a real store. What about you? Do you like clothes shopping or are you an online shopper extraordinaire?

Kay

The style gene passed me by!!

This week we're talking about fashion and style, and I'm going to off load and admit to everyone that I have no sense of style!!!

My mother, is obsessed with bags and shoes. My daughter.... obsessed with bags, shoes, clothes and makeup. To give you an example, she recently begged me to give her my brown boots (the only pair I possess), yet she has, to my knowledge 8 pairs of boots at least half of them varying shades of brown.

So, what happened to me???? I have a pair of shoes and wear them until they fall to pieces. Ditto with clothes. And as for make-up, I've been doing it in the same way since I was a teen (much to my daughter's annoyance). The thing is, I hate shopping and find buying new clothes a chore. I don't see the point in buying lots of different make-up when what I use suits me fine. And why would I want to put my feet through the torture of wearing heels, when flats are much more comfortable?

What about you? Are you a style icon.... or more like me?

Foodie Fixation

I have a new guilty pleasure: foodie shows.

Actually, not that new; it started years ago with the original Japanese show Iron Chef. I couldn't resist the comic campiness of Chairman Kaga's dramatics (like when he'd whip back the cloth to reveal the show's theme ingredient... "Kyo no tema wa..." fish innards!)

Now there are so many addicting food shows. Some of my personal favorites-

Competition shows like Top Chef, Chopped, Ultimate Cake Off

Food appreciation shows like Diners, Drive-ins and Dives (This is actually a family obsession. We will actually seek out the diners featured on this show when we are traveling - and have rarely been disappointed.)

Travel foodie shows like No Reservations and Man vs. Food

The MG series I'm working on right now features a bit of the latter - the mom is a foodie on a travel show. I'm not really sure if I became more interested in these shows because of her character or if I created her character because of my interest in these shows...

How about you? Do you watch any food shows? What are your favorites?

Me and Amelia Bedelia

So does anyone remember Amelia Bedelia? She was the housekeeper who managed to do everything wrong apart from her saving grace: she kicked butt when it came to making lemon meringue pies (moral of the story is that if you can make pie, then you can get ahead in the world!).

Anyway, I was always jealous of Amelia - not because of all the screw ups that she did, but because she had her thing. That one thing she could do better than anyone else. So, for many long years I've searched for my cooking thing but so far my only achievement is to find a meal that I burn less regularly than other meals (and I don't want to name it since we're having it tonight and I think my family has already suffered enough without me jinxing myself!!).

But, despite all of my crimes against food, I finally found my own inner Amelia Bedelia. Yup, that's right, I've got my thing.

Chocolate coconut brownies.

And I mean, I don't like to boast but I'm almost at the stage where I could make those suckers blindfolded and they would still turn out (but I won't of course because like I said before, I think my family have suffered enough). However, I can't tell you the relief I feel at now having one thing I can make, secure in the knowledge that it will turn out just like it should.

So what about everyone else? What's your cooking thing (and more importantly could a novice like me make it!!!!!!)

American Pie

(blog title courtesy of Don McClean_

So this week’s topic is food—something I love, look forward to, but also have a pretty bizarre relationship with, in that I’ll try anything once:

Pigeon pie in Morroco? Check!

Fried crickets in Santa Monica? Sure, why not!?

Lamb’s brain in Greece? Bring it on!

While, grilled octopus is one of my very favorite things in the world!

But faced with the prospect of fast food of any kind, all you can eat buffets, and/or cafeteria food—and I’d rather deal with the hunger pangs until I can locate something, er, else.

And apparently my aversion is so bad that a few years ago, a good friend and former fellow flight attendant, told me that back when we first met she was sure I had an eating disorder due to the fact that I pretty much survived six weeks of airline training on nothing but frozen yogurt (it was the only thing in the entire Delta cafeteria that I could bring myself to eat), but then later, when we shared an apartment in NYC and she saw me in action at a restaurant, she quickly changed her mind.

So what about YOU?

What food will you avoid at all costs?

PS- SHADOWLAND was released yesterday, and it's WalMart's "Read of the Month!!"

Travel: Wild, Wonderful West Virginia!

My dad's family from waaaay back when is from West Virginia. I try to get there at least once a year--Dad's buried there now--and it's always a place full of ghosts and stories and new adventures, which is kind of an awesome combo. Here are some pics from my latest WVA visit this fall.

Walking "the farm," my great-grandfather's former residence (this is me by the tool shed).



Kayaking and reading a little Cassie Clare!



Dinner at my cousin Molly Moss's farmhouse is eaten under a photo of Robert E. Lee... here's Dave in the dining room with General Lee looking on:


Also in Molly's farmhouse is an old photo of my grandmother Carol and her brother Clem. I'm obsessed with these antique family photos. LOVE them:


There's a lot of land along the Potomac where my great-grandfather's farm sits. The house is falling down, but it's full of old letters and notes and magic. Maybe even ghosts. I love going to see it:


My friend Pete Kephart lives right near the old farm and is an amazing artist. He experiments with lots of styles, the latest of which is Fire Painting. How cool is this?! Learn more here. (And come to his show in NYC if you're around in December).



These are all to say that sometimes the best travel consists of a trip where you go back home to places from your family's past. Anyone else have somewhere as special as WVA is to me? I hope you do!

If I ran the high school English department...

Last week, I returned to my own high school for the first time since I graduated. I didn't have a particular fondness for the place. In fact that is putting it lightly. I hated high school so much, I graduated a semester early just to get out of there. (Before I went, I recounted my own most memorable high school moments on my blog, so if you want, you can check those out here.) It was weird to be there again after almost 13 years. I remember the stairways and where the exits were located more than anything, more than the classrooms. I guess it just illustrates how I felt about high school, always planning my escape. Other stuff looked vaguely familiar, like it could have been the same or could have been different. I'm pretty sure the English Department was in a new place, but I could be wrong.

I went there to meet with two English classes. One was a combination American Lit/pre-journalism class, and another was the creative writing class. If you were to predict which students were more interested in talking to me, which would you guess? Well, I would have guessed the latter. I didn't take creative writing in high school (scheduling conflict during my senior semester), but if I had and I'd had the chance to meet a real writer, one that had survived... err graduated from my high school, I would have been so thrilled. But as it turned out, most of the kids in that class took it because they thought it would be "easy," a blow-off elective (OMG, writing is so not easy!!!). The kids in the pre-journalism class were honors students. They were excited and wanted to know all about me (they asked some questions that were a wee bit too personal and I really hope don't end up in the school newspaper article they are writing). The time in that class just flew by. The other dragged, awkwardly because the few kids that were interested couldn't keep things afloat.

In between the two classes, I got to eat lunch in the staff cafeteria with the teacher. That was pretty exciting because it was one place in my school I'd never been. I'd never even thought about there being a staff cafeteria because I'd never thought about teachers doing human things like eating. The teacher asked me what I remembered about my high school English experience, what books I read, what I liked, what I didn't, who I had as teachers.

My two most memorable English classes were the one I loved most and the one I hated most. The one I hated most was English lit, junior year. I always looked forward to my English classes and I knew this one would have Shakespeare so I was extra excited. But I hated it. The way the teacher analyzed things, told us what was right and wrong drove me crazy. And it was in the Hemingway room. Hemingway graduated from my high school and as I understand it, hated it and my hometown as much I did. That is the only thing I ever liked about Hemingway. I hated his writing style, thought his subject matter was boring and borderline misogynist and to sit in a room dedicated to him. *shudder*

The class I loved most was an elective, Humanities. We got more of a say in what we read. Different kinds of books were assigned like Fahrenheit 451 by Bradbury, which my teacher allowed me to write an essay comparing themes in it to those in Trainspotting by Irvine Welsh. This meant I got to write about a book I was passionate about and I got state my thoughts about it as opposed to being told how to interpret things.

The teacher whoI visited agreed with me that it was important to let teens interpret what they read and not tell them what is right or wrong, just ask them to back up their interpretation with textual evidence. She also agreed with me that the old canon (ie. the dead white guys) that they still teach in high school is... old. She says many teachers will argue that they are classics and have withstood the test of time, but she thinks the kids lackluster response proves differently.

Now I was kind of a freak who loved the classics. I adore Shakespeare (except when jerky teachers don't let me try my hand at interpreting it). As a girl whose love life was subject of the rumormill at the time I read The Scarlet Letter, I related to it. It's one of my favorite books. Loved the Great Gatsby as well. I hated Farewell To Arms and still do. I had to read Tom Sawyer and Catcher in the Rye again post-high school to really get them. I'm glad I didn't read Grapes of Wrath in high school because I'm sure it would have been ruined for me. And I think the people who hated some of the other classics might have gotten more from them in college. But still, the most excited I was about English class was when I got to read a book of my own choosing, a book I loved. And if the point of English class is to get teens reading and encourage them to enjoy reading, wouldn't it be better to bring in books they are interested in?

It was a huge compliment when the teacher I met with told me, "You know, I would love to teach your book in my American Lit class." But she had her doubts she could get that past the powers that be. Instead she is trying to propose an elective class featuring Chicago authors with the hopes that some of us can visit and meet the kids. Definitely a cool idea, but it will attract those honors kids who are already interested in reading.

If I could lord over the high school English classes in America, I'd turn the curriculum on it's head and say for every classic we read, we find at least one contemporary to read too, preferably something with a comparable theme to help the teens find their way into the classic. Two of the books I'd love to see on curriculum alongside those classics are Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson and Monster by Walter Dean Myers. Books that deal with real issues faced by teens and will raise awareness and create a real dialogue in the classroom.

What about you? Do you like the classics? What contemporary books would you add to the high school curriculum if you could?

Be True To Your School

It's timely that the topic at TFC this week is Schools, given that yesterday I did a book-signing at my favorite school: The Unquowa School, where I was a student - once upon a very long time ago - for nearly six years. Unquowa was the first place that it occurred to me that if I wanted something, dreamed of achieving something, and I was willing to put the necessary work in, I could realize my goals.

When I first began at Unquowa, I was in fourth grade and it was the middle of fall term. Compared to the other students I was behind in math and science, and a few other things as well, like music. I couldn't quite figure out what to do with the recorder I was given in music class and when I was given an audio quiz where I was supposed to identify what I was hearing, I'm fairly certain I did preposterous things like mistaking the harp for the bassoon.

At the end of the term, the headmaster, who was a very old-school headmaster, arranged to speak with me in an empty classroom. There, he explained that the grades I had received were not exactly stellar. They weren't completely abysmal - there were no Fs involved - but C seemed to be the common theme and there was at least one D there. I was sure I was about to get kicked out of the school, having never felt good enough to be there in the first place, but that wasn't what he had in mind. Very kindly he explained that I shouldn't feel bad about those grades, since my previous school had not given me the proper tools, and then more kindly still he set out to explain how if in the next semester I did X and I did Y and I did Z, that no, I couldn't achieve an A average for this school year - although, who, he wondered aloud, could say what I might achieve in future years? - but that it was possible to lift it all up to a solid B average.

So that's what I proceeded to do. I did X and I did Y and I did Z, and at the end of the year I made the Honor Roll for the first time, receing a white card with green lettering that said Second Honors. As time wore on, I would achieve First Honors, and eventually the coveted gold cards that read Headmaster's List. Those gold cards became a regular thing in my life.

It's not that there wasn't hard work involved, but someone had taken the time to draw me a road map to success and I was smart enough to take that road.

Unquowa was critical in instilling in me the desire for intellectual achievement, but in every other aspect as well it also encouraged the confidence that if I wanted a thing and was willing to put the work in, almost anything was possible.

In seventh grade I tried out for the girls' basketball team. Four-foot-eleven and athletically challenged, my skills earned me a place as last person on the team. Having spent most of the year on the bench, I resolved to get better. I knew there was nothing I could do about my lack of height, but I could learn to run faster and I could learn to develop a killer outside shot, which I achieved by getting my one-foot-taller older brother to train me every day over the summer. By the time I was in ninth grade, my last year at Unquowa, I was co-captain of the team.

Academics, athletics - it's all good, but there's got to be a social aspect to school life as well. At Unquowa, I never lacked for feeling socially connected to other people. It was there I discovered that people could be complex, that the same person - me - could be an A student and an athlete and a social butterfly and fashion conscious; that in fact there was no need to ever be pigeonholed into those narrow boxes that some schools tend to force people into. That refusal to be pigeonholed as one thing or another has served me well in life.

Academics, athletics, social stuff - what have I left out? Politics! When I started at Unquowa it had a five-day-a-week dress code involving uniforms. The school had been in existence since 1917 and girls had never worn pants but when I was in seventh grade we finally organized ourselves and brought our case to the Board of Governors, resulting in a modified dress code that allowed us to dress far more liberally on everything but Fridays and assembly days. It was the same pattern all over again: wanting a thing, creating a road map, and going for it.

Finally, were it not for Unquowa, I don't know as that I'd be a writer today. It was there, when I was 12 years old and in the eighth grade, than an English teacher was so impressed with one of my stories that he made the class listen to it three days running. It was there that for the first time it occurred to me that maybe I had stories to tell that other people would want to hear.

So that's my story of Unquowa love. There would be other schools in my life following my graduation from Unquowa in the bicentennial year of 1976, but none would inspire so much school love or have such a profound impact, although each would form me in some way. But that was just fine. I'd already been given the map I needed.

QUESTION OF THE DAY: WHAT SCHOOL HAD THE MOST PROFOUND IMPACT ON YOU?

Be well. Don't forget to write.

What Can and Can't be Worn to School

If you know me, you know I get really into Halloween. So I couldn't very well post the day after my favorite holiday without sharing a few photos. This is my family, minus the youngest who went as Spider Man. (My husband has his camera and I'm afraid I haven't downloaded his photo yet.) So, now that I have this out of my system, I will discuss this week's topic: School.

It seems like what people can and can't wear to school is always making news. Just the other day, there was an article about a junior high girl who got her nose pierced to honor her Sikh background. Since this piercing didn't adhere to the school's body piercing rule (meaning it was somewhere besides her ears), she was suspended. As you can imagine, it caused quite an uproar. The school and girl eventually compromised and she stuck a clear plastic stud in her nose.

Here's another story for you. Now, keep in mind that this is from my babysitters who go to our local junior high, and I have no idea why they'd make this up, but keep in mind I haven' t heard this from the school itself, so I'm going to leave names out in case there was some misinterpretation. I do, however, think this is probably a rule at other schools so I feel justified in mentinioning it here. This particular junior high doesn't allow "cross dressing" for Halloween. So, a boy cannot dress like a female cheerleader or an old lady or Madonna. A girl cannot dress like Michael Jackson or Santa or Peter Pan. Anyway, you get the idea.

On the other hand, our local elementary school allowed its students to wear masks for the Halloween parade portion of the school day.

I left out my opinion on purpose because I'm curious what you think of these particular school-issued rules: body piercing, opposite sex costumes for Halloween, and masks for Halloween.

Note passing and other trials of youth

So I was chatting with my neighbor the other day about her son getting caught passing notes in class. And while we were talking, I mentioned that I used to be a champion note passer in class. Mostly in junior high, but some in high school as well. I'm not proud of this, mind you, but it was a moment of nostalgia that brought back memories.

I had a laugh thinking about the one time I got caught--I mean, really caught--passing notes in class. The sad part is that I wasn't even passing it yet! I was just sitting at my desk writing the darn thing.

Our junior high had this open air classroom section that looked like this:

Okay, so see where my math class was? All of those yellow hearts represent my lovely fellow classmates of 7th grade advanced math. The pink heart represents one Kay Cassidy, student of 7th grade advanced math/lover of all things note-related.

So I'm sitting there writing a note and all of the sudden, the social studies teacher comes around the end of the divider to make a joke to our math teacher and (with the stealth of a child going for the cookie jar ten minutes before dinner) snatches the note off my desk and holds it above her head like a prize.

So. Busted.

She then proceeded to read said note to the entire class. Thankfully, it was NOT about my crush du jour. Instead, and far worse in ways I didn't understand until later, it was about how horrifically boring said math teacher was. Which I felt TERRIBLE about because he was really a sweet guy. But, you know, 7th grade advanced math. Not exactly mesmerizing stuff.

As you might guess, I got teased about that for the rest of the year, mostly by my teacher (who I also realized later had an excellent sense of humor). He would stop class periodically throughout the year and ask "I'm not boring you, am I, Kay?" when I was totally paying attention, thankyouverymuch.

Fortunately, my teacher and I actually got along great so it was more like good-natured ribbing. I had him for 8th grade advanced math and then for typing in 9th grade, so he never got rid of me until high school.

By the way, there's a tidbit in my debut novel, The Cinderella Society (sorry for the plug, but it's where this comes from), that I think is fitting to mention here. In the book, the Cindys (the members of The Cinderella Society) have a great strategy to help put stressful or embarrassing situations into perspective. It's called The Rule of 5s.

Here's how it works:

Whenever something really stressful or embarrassing happens, stop and take five slow, deep breaths.

1... 2... 3... 4... 5.

(You feel better already, right?)

Then, stop and ask yourself the Five questions.

1) Will this matter in five hours?

2) Will this matter in five months?

3) Will this matter in five years?

This technique is actually based on a newspaper column from the mid-80s that my mom gave the drama queen that was teenaged me. You'd be surprised how effective it can be to put things in perspective. Even things that seem horrific and mortifying often don't pass the five-month test. And things like someone cutting you off in traffic? Those don't even pass the five-hour test.

It's all about perspective. :-)

So next time you're stressed or angry or mortified, give the Cindys' Rule of 5s a spin. I hope it works as well for you as it does for me. Let me know what you think!

~ Kay