However, this time, the reason I couldn't remember any of them was because about six months ago I made the conscious decision to stop beating myself up about my past mistakes.
There was a time when I could be quite happily walking down the street and I would suddenly be overwhelmed with negative feelings because of something that I had done twenty years ago. It was actually getting to the point of ridiculousness and I would find that a perfectly good mood would suddenly be gone and I'd be anxious and upset all over again.
Then, after it happening one too many times I finally decided that I'd had enough of reliving the past so I decided to forgive myself for the stupid/dumb/embarrassing things that I had done (and while I was at, I even included the stupid/dumb/embarrassing things that I will no doubt do in the future) and I can't begin to tell you how much better I feel for it. Of course some of them still sneak through but I know what they are now and I know what to do them with!
So my challenge to everyone is pause next time you have a flashback to an embarrassing moment and instead of letting it overwhelm and own you, just have a laugh, forgive yourself and let it go the way of all unwanted thoughts (you know, the place in our mind we leave the Brussel Sprout Souffle recipes that our mothers mistakenly think we might be interested in knowing).
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7 comments:
Best. Advice. Ever. If I'd used all the energy I've wasted thinking about regrettable moments that I can't change for writing, I reckon I'd have written about ten books by now!
LOVE this, Amanda! I've been trying to do it too. Self-forgiveness goes a long way! :)
Great post, Amanda! I'm too busy creating new embarrassing moments to focus on past ones.
Well said! Now if I could just remember this fabulous advice at crucial moments...
Aimee - it's so crazy isn't it. The thing that bugged me the most was how these thoughts would just appear at random moments and then would take over. It's so empowering to get over them!!!
Alyson - it sure does. If we could only treat ourselves the same way we treat our friends, it would help a lot!!!!
Lauren - hahaha - well that's definitely a start (and I struggle to imagine you ever doing anything embarrassing because of your awesomeness!!!)
Gerb - next time it happens, you will hear my delightful Australia/NZ/UK accent ringing out in your mind and you will be so shocked that you will totally forget what you had been thinking about. Sorted!!!
LOVE this post, Amanda!
I had a relive-a-bad-moment moment just this morning, and it's such great advice to LET GO. We all have them. Ah, self-forgiveness.
Melissa - ugh - it's so awful isn't it? I used to literally feel my face heating up when I had certain past-blasts. Such a waste of time that could be better spent being fabulous!!!!
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