Notice, the use of the word “week” and not just “Thanksgiving Day.” Because Thanksgiving isn’t a day anymore. It lasts ALL week. Especially when you arrive at your in-laws the Monday before Thanksgiving and don’t leave until the Monday after. Let it suffice to say that all we did the ENTIRE week was eat.
So after stuffing our faces for a full seven days, my husband and I became resolved to go on a diet when we got home. Except we never diet like normal people. We don’t buy diet books or subscribe to fancy websites that count your calories. We prefer to make up our own diets.
Like this week. We decided that as soon as soon we got home, we would go on a “Soup Diet.” That’s right. Nothing but soup for five days straight. YUM! (We do love soup!) So off we went to the supermarket to stock up on all our favorite organic soups. And the diet was going quite well until about…well, six hours later, when we’d both consumed an unbelievable amount of soup and were craving...well, just about anything else but soup.
So I said, “You know...come to think about it. Soup might not be enough. I think we should be allowed to eat salad too. After all, salad is perfectly healthy and no diet should ever exclude salad.” My husband readily agreed and our diet quickly transformed from the “Soup Diet” to the “Soup and Salad Diet.” YUM! (We do love soup and salad!)
Well, that went pretty well until we were driving around the next day, feeling pretty hungry and not at ALL in the mood for soup or salad, when we happened upon a sushi place. Our mouths immediately started to water. (We do both love sushi!)
So I said, “You know...come to think about it. Sushi is really healthy too. And as long as you don't have any tempura rolls or anything with cream cheese in it, the ingredients of sushi are pretty much the same as the ingredients of soup. Except...you know...without the broth.”
My husband readily agreed and our diet soon after became known as the “Soup, Salad and Sushi Diet.”
Well, it went on like this for a good couple days. And eventually the title of our "Diet" contained so many foods, we stopped calling it by all the things we could eat and started calling it by all the things we couldn't. And by Thursday afternoon, it had turned into the “No Fried Foods or Dairy Diet.”
And that lasted until around Thursday night when my parents treated us for dinner and my mom just had to order those sinfully delicious Fried Cheese Wontons. And...well...you can probably guess what happened next.
Oh well, better luck next Thanksgiving.
So come on…who else has invented crazy diets (successful or otherwise)?
8 comments:
Jessica, this is seriously hysterical. You should be a writer.
How bizarre! That was actually me who made that last comment but even though I was signed out of GBC...oh, well!
Ha ha! That reminds me of when my husband and I decided we would only eat veggies and fruit for Breakfast/Lunch and only fish with dinner. That lasted about 3 days.
Jessica - hahaha - that is seriously funny! And while I don't make up diets (apart from the kind where you can eat all the chocolate you want as long as its Thursday morning 'cos then it never has any calories!!!) I do know another ya author who might just dabble in her own version of diets - yes Sara Hantz, I'm talking to you!!!!
I don't know what you're talking about hahahahahaha
LOL. Just catching up on my blog commenting after a seven day cruise! And guess what I did during the entire cruise???? EAT!!!
Okay, starting tomorrow I'm initiating a new diet. Will start brainstorming now...
HA! I love it! Soup, salad and sushi. I could totally get behind that. But can we add chocolate too?
Thanks for the article. Very interesting.
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