Thursday, January 27

The 7 weirdest things my cat has eaten

If you follow me on twitter, you probably hear quite a bit about my cats. So I've decided to take today to help you get to know one of them.

Here's the group:


Lars is the little gray and white guy to the left, sweet as can be.

Sid is the black and white hanging out in the cat bed. I've had him since I was sixteen.

And that big gray tomcat front and center is Kaspar. Kinda looks like he's eating his toy, doesn't it?

Yeah, Kaspar's an odd one.

But he's very sweet (and he and Lars have a very special relationship)


My former roommate found him on the mean streets of Chicago as a kitten and named him after Kaspar Hauser, a German youth who wandered into a village one day and everyone assumed he'd been raised in the forest like a wild creature. Just to clarify since everyone always wonders why it's Kaspar not Casper and why a gray cat would have what seems like it should be a white cat's name.

Apparently in his short time as an alley cat, Kaspar developed quite a fear that he may never eat again. Despite the fact that he eats heartily twice a day and has for seven years, you will find him trying to steal Lars and Sid's food (Lars lets him, Sid doesn't) or licking out the sink after you've rinsed your dishes because DUDE there can NEVER be ENOUGH FOOD! He also hovers when you cook and will raid just about any item you leave out. So I thought it would be a great list to make a list of the top seven most bizarre things that Kaspar likes to eat.

7. Okay, fair warning, this one is disgusting. Lars has a little bit of a weak stomach and sometimes he pukes up his food right after he ate it. Kaspar apparently thinks he is a baby bird or maybe a dog (he does have a lot of dog-like tendencies, so sometimes we wonder exactly who his parents were) and he eats what Lars threw up if you don't clean it fast enough.

6. All my cats have been drawn toward tuna. Sid has a history of jumping into a pizza box or grabbing steak straight off a boyfriend's plate (his vegan mom has long denied him exposure to these delicacies). My childhood cat like polish sausage and cookies, but Kaspar likes fruit. Last summer whenever I cut up watermelon, there he was begging like it was sirloin.

5. Okay, watermelon is sweet, we can get that, but Kaspar also eats veggies. In fact, when my roommate moved out and left him with me (he got along better with my cats than her other cat), she made me promise that every time I cut up bell peppers, I would give him a piece. I am a woman of my word, so I also do. And the other cats always look upset that he is getting a special treat, but then they sniff it and get as confused as I am.

4. This is a cute picture, right? Kaspar is getting into the Halloween spirit?

No. He's trying to eat the jack o'lantern. In fact we will not be able to leave him in the room alone with it. And I will quickly discover that he knows butternut and acorn squash are in the same family.

3. My other cats can tell the difference between soy meat substitutes and actual meat. If Kaspar notices, he doesn't care. One day my husband was preparing to microwave a plate of vegan "buffalo wings." So it's spicy wheat protein basically. And it was FROZEN. Hubby went upstairs to answer the phone and Kaspar grabbed one of those suckers. Not knowing how to use the microwave did not bother him. His plan was to hold onto it until it defrosted enough to eat. He growled at us like Stephen King's demon dog Cujo when we tried to take it away.... until a noise scared him, he dropped it, and I snatched it away.

2. We thought it was safe to leave out condiments around him.... until we found that he had torn open and devoured a packet of Taco Bell hot sauce. It wasn't the mild kind either. But maybe it's the pepper or he got a taste for it from those "buffalo wings"?

1. The very first picture should have made you suspicious. Maybe you already know what is coming. Kaspar really loves to eat and he really loves certain toys, furry and feathery things in particular because he thinks they are mice or birds. He even does the growling thing over them sometimes and probably gets frustrated that we laugh instead of being intimidated. Well, on Christmas Eve we handed out three toys to our three cats, instructing them to share. But there was a furry ball on a string that Kaspar liked. Sid did too, but Kaspar did not want him to have it. So he ate it. My husband caught him with the string in his mouth and we worried for a couple days that we would need to take him to the vet. But his appetite was as voracious as normal and he didn't exhibit any signs that it was bothering him. Cats eat mice, we told ourselves. And Kaspar ate Taco Bell hot sauce without any problems, so he'll either process it or puke it up. The Monday after Christmas, we found a fuzzy vomit pile in our bedroom. Kaspar did not try to eat that.

Hopefully I made you laugh more than I made you gag. What are some of your pets' strangest quirks?

8 comments:

Jeff Hirsch said...

Just had to mention that we have a cat named Henry that A) was found on the mean streets of NYC B) looks exactly like Kaspar and C) is constantly ravenous, steals the other cat's food and will eat anything.

Long lost brothers?

donnas said...

It has to be Chicago former street cat thing. I have a cat that I got from Animal Control who acts the same way.

Amy Lukavics said...

LOL! My Luna is also a fan of eating vegetables, which is honestly just so WEIRD...like, what cat eats lettuce, you know ??

Kaspar sounds like such a fun, personality filled kitty. The Taco Bell sauce one made me lol.

Stina13 said...

My cats eat old expired vegetables too :P I found a can in the pantry and my mom told me to feed it to them. I didn't think they would actually lick the entire bowl clean! They love it when we pour old bacon grease over the top of it for them!

Shana Norris said...

I thought my cat BC was the only one that ate what other cats threw up! None of the other cats I've ever had have ever done that, but BC does. He also eats dry dog food (the big Beneful pieces), mashed potatoes, biscuits, beans, toothpaste, and tubes of athlete's foot cream that my husband leaves laying around. I should mention that "BC" stands for "Bad Cat." ;)

~The Book Pixie said...

Okay that's just too funny! lol. That picture of Kaspar in the box with the water, yeah my cat, Rudy, does that exact same thing. He also happenes to love to drink...wait for it...sweet tea. No joke. He's a true southern kitty. lol. He also has a thing for licking some of the oddest stuff. Most popularly, pictures. If there is a picture laying around without being in a frame or album, he's going to try and lick the color off. lol. As for one of the weirdest things my cat eats, he has an appetite for ARTIFICAL Christmas trees. Thankfully this is just a seasonal habit. Rudy will also eat just about anything with garlic in it. Oh yeah, he belongs with us.

Thanks for the hilarious post! :D

~Briana

Lauren Baratz-Logsted said...

Who cares what kind of weird things they eat? They're *cats* (which equals "best animal ever"!

Stephanie Kuehnert said...

Loving all these cat stories guys!! I'm glad I'm not the only one with a strange eater! and Lauren is right, they are the best animal ever!